Sunday All Over the World

Morning:
I like Sundays. It is my favorite day of the week. Usually. Today: Dreary. Cold. Snow Dusting. Depressed. Tired. Homesick. Morning tea postponed: hotel hot water downstairs in thermos smells like coffee. No go. Dave working,
The ghosts that haunt this area, and all the way to Boston, are thick as thieves.
Tea at Starbucks.

Afternoon:
Sun is out. Downing Rescue Remedy like water.

'Soft flexible mind is the way'
My mind is obviously neither soft, nor flexible…

I am unskilled at applying the principles from my practice to my day to day life:

What is available right now?
Where is the edge?
What is too much?
What is too little?
How much energy do I need?
What are alternate approaches?
How small is a bite-sized piece?
Determine what is a bite-sized piece.
Take bite-sized pieces.

What needs the focus of my energy?

What needs weeding?
What needs watering?
How much can I handle?
Take frequent breaks.

Feeling selfish makes all my work seem transparent, insincere, and like a sham. Ironic that I think some things ought to be easy, and that things ought to change quickly. Nothing changes quickly. Lives do not often have avalanches, at least not ones that have not been building for years, occurring only by surprise due to unawareness. Has it been snowing? Wow! I hadn’t noticed! Circumstances, feelings, actions, reactions, habits- all morph, grow, change, and evolve over time. No quick fixes. No instant gratification. Slow, methodical, smart work yield Big Change. Just like the Universe. Since I am the Universe and It is me- us…all of us, why might I think I’d be organized any differently than a glacier, a forest, an ocean?

Radical listening practice.

Zazen.

More radical listening practice.

Reading down by the fire. Always delightfully surprised at Neil Gaiman’s genius. Am in love with Anansi Boys. Scarily applicable to my life. Isn’t that what makes art good?

More radical listening practice.

Evening:
Dinner (ate too many French fries! Ugh!) and delightful visit with Mum.